This is Part One of my Sweets Review. It’s unnamed because I can’t think of a good name for it. So ‘Sweets Review’ will have to do. In this part, I’ll focus on the sugary stuff I found. Part Two will focus on the chocolates.
All products reviewed were obtained from
Chocolates On Parade
Shop 10 Norwood Mall
The Parade, Norwood SA
(Yes, I paid for them. This is not an advertisement! But it is a very good store.)
First up – Scottish Soft Rock. It looks like regular Blackpool Rock, but it’s smaller, pinker, and doesn’t have writing through it. It also doesn’t hail from Blackpool (hence the name). It doesn’t have a consistent shape, either. Though it’s tubular, the ends are irregular, and what look like air bubbles down one side.
It has quite a sweet smell. Floral, but with a hint of berry. Maybe a bit too sweet smelling, however.
Upon biting into the rock, I’m surprised. My understanding of soft rock was that it’s supposed to be of a chewy consistency, like a Redskin or a toffee, as opposed to the solid, tooth-breaking, boiled consistency of Blackpool rock. However, this rock is rather chalky, like a musk-stick. While it’s not unpleasant, it doesn’t feel right, for some reason. It dissolves in the mouth surprisingly quickly on account of the myriad air bubbles within, with very little effort. this also does not feel right.
Taste-wise, it’s definitely berry-flavoured. Not any specific berry, but very similar to mixed-berry yoghurt. However, it’s much too mild (though this may be due to the chalkiness). There’s some aftertaste, but dissipates within minutes. Again, while this isn’t unpleasant, it’s not incredible. About halfway through the stick, there is a noticeable sticky feeling in the mouth. I can tell you, this is definitely unpleasant.
My verdict? Well, it’s rather bland. Nothing about the Scottish Soft Rock really jumps out as a highlight. While it’s pleasant enough, you wouldn’t actually eat this for the taste, the novelty, or even for the mouth-feel (definitely not for the mouth-feel). I can’t be sure why it exists.
The Barratt Sherbet Fountain is a sadly overlooked treat nowadays. It’s such a simple concept – cardboard tube of sherbet, eaten with the help of a licorice stick. And there may be a good reason for this – It doesn’t always work. Opening my Sherbet Fountain, I find the licorice stick trapped in a hardened lump of sherbet, only able to be freed with much squeezing of the cardboard. Sugar consumption shouldn’t be this difficult.
The other problem is that licorice is not a reliable dipping tool. As it’s quite a soft substance, it bends when it hits the sherbet, instead of slicing through and catching a decent amount of the fizzy sugar. This is why Wizz-Fizz was so popular – the dipper was plastic, and hard enough to probe the sherbet.
Though I would like to be able to say I’m enjoying this Sherbet Fountain, I’m afraid I can’t. Why? Because there’s little payoff for the amount of work put in to catching the sherbet. The licorice is much too bendy to have any scooping power, only picking up a few particles on its tip. This bendiness only increases over time, as holding the licorice only serves to heat it up. Furthermore, the licorice flavour is much too strong and salty, effectively overpowering the delicate fizz of what little sherbet it delivers.
The sherbet, with its lemony fizz, leaves a freshness in the mouth, though it is negated by the earthy tones of the licorice.
Quite simply, the Barratt Sherbet Fountain is a good (or even great) concept, but poorly implemented. Licorice is not a good eating tool, and especially not in conjunction with sherbet. However, eating the licorice then the sherbet separately is a bit of fun.
Tizer. A drink that I’ve known about since I was three years old, but one which I’ve never tasted. According to the slogan on the can, it tastes red. It smells excruciatingly sweet, which can probably be explained by the sugar and sweetener that are both listed on the can.
It’s highly carbonated, much fizzier than Coca Cola or any sorts of soft drink we have here in Australia. I don’t usually feel the need to burp after drinking soft drink, but Tizer brings this feeling on after a few small sips.
How does it taste? Well, it tastes like sugar. There’s no real flavour to Tizer except for that of ‘sweet’. It could be said to be a tiny bit fruity, but whatever fruity taste there is, it’s overshadowed by the cloying stickiness of the sugar. It is actually making me feel nauseous, and I have a bit of a headache.
So, after waiting eighteen years for it, I can safely say that I never want to drink Tizer again. It’s like drinking carbonated cough syrup. Blech!
OK, that’s the sugary sweets done. I have a headache. Yuk. Chocolates on their way!