half goon half god

Live(ish) from Adelaide

In Uncategorized on December 10, 2006 at 9:25 pm

As it’s stinking hot today (Friday), I’ve decided to do a bit of culture. So I’m at the SA Museum.

I first had a look at the animals. Poor things. I wonder if somebody told them that they would be in a glass cabinet for all eternity… A plaque says that they all died at Adelaide Zoo or something, so I guess that’s better than going out and killing things in the wilde, but there’s baby hippos and stuff. The little baby monkey. It had no chance.

The Egypt room kind of freaked me out. It’s a very small room, and there’s an old dead woman lying on a shelf. Bad vibes. I got slightly light-headed. I had to look at fish fossils to calm down.

They need to fix up the museum, I reckon. There’s corridors to nowhere and mangy animals. The Australian animals are in a corridor masquerading as a room. Disgraceful. And too much of it is aimed at schools. The language on the cards and things is too simple. I don’t mind making it more accessible to schools, but I don’t like it having such an effect on the scientific nature of a museum. Plus, the birds room need an update. It looks like the displays were made in the 70s.

Now I’m at the Art Gallery. Let’s see how it comapres to Melbourne’s…

Anybody can be an artist, it seems. Especially is you call it modern art. One piece is a bit of paper with a pen doodle of a man. Another is a completely black canvas with a red border. And 3 metal deckchairs apparently constitutes a comment on something or other. I coould do that!

There’s this thing they’re doing here called ‘small talk’, where 12-year-old kids comment on the art. One comment, on a piece of canvas with scribbling all over it, says ‘This makes me feel like I can relate to it’. The teacher obviously told the kids to write whether they can relate to the artwork, and this particular one buggered it up. Another comment on a salt shaker from the 1580s – an incredible gold sculpture – “My Nannie has a cat salt shaker. It’s blue and white”. Why are they allowing a child to compare a centuries-old piece of art to a $20 ornament, probably picked up at Cunningham’s or a chemist/gift shop.

Well, I guess the gallery’s pretty good. The smaller size compared to Melbourne’s makes sense, but they could do more with the space. Getting rid of the video screens with the bits of paper would be a start. It’s pointless. Just like that black thing. What’s it saying? Nothing. Get rid of it.

The Academy cinema is totally 70s. All brown metal and brick. Brown metal annoys me. It makes everything look rubbish. It’s a cheapener. There isn’t even a real ticket counter. You have to buy it along with your Coke and popcorn. I’m going to see Casino Royale because I can’t be arsed doing anything else.

Casino Royale turned out to be excellent. As well as being highly entertaining, it kept me air-conditioned for the better part of the afternoon, and gave me somewhere to sit down!

  1. I know the black piece of canvas with a red border you speak of.

    I quite like it, to tell the truth, though I am more interested in why it is rather than what it is. But I am certain that is the point, to prompt comments such as yours and mine.

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